lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
The week has barely started and it's already stressful. The apartment-hunting was so far quite unsuccessful, and thus, rather depressing :(
And it's raining. It's been raining for days now and does not look like it will ever stop.


Summer rain is actually quite nice but it also brings a certain lazy, sluggish feeling with it. The light outside seems creamy and grey, the raindrop melody is soothing and sleepy, and I'd like to stay in bed forever. Curled up with a hot cup of Earl Grey tea and one of Zola's touching novels. 

Except, I can't. Or at least - I shouldn't b
ecause the original planing for the evening featured:

1) homework for tomorrow: electric properties of a neuron, which is actually one of my favourite biophysic topics, but my own neurons are way too slowly today to wrap themselves around the exercises and lectures.

2) tiding up: which I always procrastinate till the final state, so that I can't even find my mobile phone, when it's buzzing. Whoever it was, who tried to reach me, he should have been more patient than that.

3) If I did find my needle in the chaos, I still have to make the two plushy stuffed atoms
(Gold and Hydrogen) for my friend, who is celebrating her Master of Science this week. Yay, her!  :)

Or to say it the Hergé style:



The photo is not the best, but my trusty scanner exists only in my imagination (together with a nice, old-fashioned house with a cryptic garden) and the bitchy but real one from the university keeps on drawing annoying strings into the picture. I'm sure, I could have solved the problem, but you don't want to spent too much time on a public scanner, fumbling with an eye-catching bright comic book, while all the people around you look so serious with their black-white documents and homework sheets.
Maybe next time.

It's from the this treasure I found in one of our libraries last week. It contains musings about
Hergé's archive and some background infos, which are quite fascinating.

For example:

In Hergé's head!canon Alcazar met his bossy wife (who is the daughter of the arms dealer B. Bazaroff from The Broken Ear) in a music hall in New York ;) One day I'd love to read a fanfiction dealing with the two sweethearts


Also, the godfather for the professor (Auguste Piccard) was quite a nice-looking chap and had indeed set records on both altitude flight and deep-sea dive. Except, the real prof was extraordinary tall. Hergé had to make him smaller so that he would fit into the picture square just fine ;)



(Dialogue: 'Why?.. No doubt your name happens to be Red Rackham?' 'Yes?')

Some more photos from the same page because I find the random
postcard, which was the inspiration for Haddocks apartment, absolutely endearing ;)Read more... )

Okay, now back to sleep, drinking tea, tiding up while searching for a needle in the haystack, learning more about neurons. There are already excited. Oh my,  am I really going to end the entry with such a lame line? Yes, I am.

To work!

Jun. 7th, 2012 11:07 pm
lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Taking the Captain as my role model once again:



I'm not fond of whiskey but there are plenty of other possibilities at hand....

Since the presentation on Friday is in English, I will sit down and improve my poor linguistic skills.“ so she said and opened the new tab on the bookmark  'Archive of our own'. Because English used in fanfictions has almost the same vocabulary as in any scientific topic. Especially when it comes to sigmatropic rearrangements. As if.

(But: If I get a cent each time I say 'homo' during my presentation, I'd be a rich girl by the end of the week. Too bad it's mostly just the highest occupied molecule orbital.)


Also, why do I keep saying Wodehouse instead of Woodward? P.G. Wodehouse would have never written such ridiculous rule
s...

The problem is: As much as I love tutoring my students or talking without drawing a breath about my current obsession or just having a nice chat with my friends about any topic you name (even the ones I have nothing to say about)... I just lose all of my charm when you have me standing in front of a big audience, when noone cares about what you are saying. Well, except for the examiner of cause. Who happened to be the one who once gave me the worst mark of my life in an oral exam. Lucky me.

Let's hope my English will be so bad, he wont even understand me and will have to pretend the presentation was alright and he has no further questions.

Who am I kidding?..

Back to reading fanfiction learning.


lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Generally speaking, a frustrated spin glass is a disordered magnet system with conflicting interactions between the spins. Diverse forces prevent the spin glass from reaching the energetic minimum (which is the longed-for destination of all systems) - thus, making the system frustrated.

Applying the phenomena to one certain [personal profile] lokuro-particle, one might observe a disturbing amount on fidgetiness. The inability to relax and therefor to function properly. When I'm at work, I keep on thinking about Tintin, comparing the Captain to Bertie Wooster and dream up some weird fanfiction plots.
When at home I'm unable to shoot the university stuff down (and thus, making my fandom-related posts absolutely unreadable).

The upcoming presentation I have to prepare for the next Friday isn't that comforting either. I still don't fully grasp the subject, which makes it a bit difficult to speak about it (in English!) for full 40 minutes. Plus, 20 minutes discussion afterwards.
"Most disturbing, Sir."

So, I'm trying to bring peace to my inner tumour by the good old methods... no, the 81% chocolate with chili isn't working anymore: it's the air-gun shooting :)

It's been years since I've been to my club (well, to be precise: half a year) and the established clientèle certainly isn't getting any younger (with an average member being about twice my age). But somehow I find all these nice grannies and respectable old-fashioned gents adorable.

As for the shooting itself. Gosh, I've been missing the soothing feeling

Don't get any wrong ideas but it's the most calming sport I know. And I've been into a lot of... well, martial arts :) Now, I'm almost ready for that nasty presentation next week. Almost.

_______________________________________________


Another way too calm the spirits down are fashion posts. It's raining, so I'll try to be as colourful as my camera and the GIMP program allowed. Welcome to the Haddock!ascot inspired neck porn session ;)
neck wear, colours and dresses )

A colourful weekend, ahoy!



PS.: The Tintin-vid is now download-able (last entry) since it's blocked in Germany and I can't see it anymore, which is kind of annoying. I know it's not that good but I'd like to decide it myself and not via youtube jury.


lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Finally, a Friday that feels like holiday.
The room is filled with golden sunlight, all the thoughts which are more complicated than a simple 'actio et reactio' are banned and the weekend trip to my parents is planned and sealed. (I've convinced them to re-watch the Spielberg "Tintin"-movie and on Sunday we'll go hiking to the Marienburg castle, chatting about the entropy and the 'latest' Wodehouse novels).
To put it short: Life's awesome.

Also, it was a hell of a week. An almost inhuman heat (I wanted a thunderstorm so badly but it never came), lots of scientific papers to read and comprehend, preparation for a bally tedious 40-minutes English presentation about some sigma-reactions I still don't fully understand and an oral examination to survive.

Especially the last one was putting my nerves on edge. It's about my favorite physical stuff (kinetics of reactions) but the examiner is a Humboldt-Prize winner, a world-known chemist and possibly my future chef (for I'd love to do my Ph.D. at the Mark-Planck-Institution... if they want me as well? ^^") So, I was nervous. Like, really nervous.
The day before I tried to relax, so I took my bicycle and went on riding into the forest covering the hills all around Goettingen (it's really picturesque round here). And I got lost. It was the first time ever that I got lost and the most embarrassing experience of the last few years. I started my trip at about 8 p.m. and when I finally did get home if was about 1 a.m. One good side-effect: I was indeed distracted from the exam-worries.

Also, I've got an 1.3 which is marvelous :)
1.3 is about the same as "A-", I guess. Just - you'll never get the A-mark if you have to deal with our profs. To quote one of my fellow students about some another exam: "I've answered each one of the damn questions he asked and still! He said, for an 1.0 my answers were lacking that certain something, that je ne sais quoi, if you know what I mean. I wonder, if he wanted me topless or something." Love you guys >D

Well, as for me I'm fine with my 1.3 :) More than just fine, actually. Temporary happiness for everyone? >:)

(it's not champagne - though, I would appreciate that one as well - it's dry white-wine with soda and some strawberry added.)

P.S.: Jet another quote from one of the OC-seminar presentations (yes, the one I'm still working on) from some other fellow student on the theme of herbicides:
"The task of a chemist is to kill. But we don't want to kill everything."
I think, I want a shirt with that one.


/Off to buy some ice-cream to make the party perfect.
lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)

Want this whisky bottle oh so badly, don't you, Captain? ;)



The above mentioned picture shows Me and the Internet the right way to fight the temptation. In fact, the only way, if you're not the Oscar Wilde type (according to him the best way is to yield to it.) Lucky me, our Internet was down for a while - so the start in the new semester was rather smooth this time ;) I had plenty of time for the theater, experimental reports and walking in the rain. And I still can't decide whether to go into the Biophysics or Laser-Spectroscopy.. I'll bet you, I will end up writing my master thesis in an entirely different subject >D

Also - never neglect an opportunity to post an excerpt of your current obsession. I've already told you how those (that is -
obsessions) tend to affect me, right? Mostly in a positive sense. Obviously, "The Adventures of Tintin" isn't such a good influence as one might expect...

Since my hair is already standing up in a most ridiculous way (due to a misguided hairdresser who apparently had something against me. And the gravity), the Fate (such a joker) had a fresh idea. Nether alcohol nor a smoking pipe but an epic crash down the stairs. It could have been a page out of a comic book for all the banging down. Step for step. Really - I always thought the authors were exaggerating but it certainly is possible to fall down the stairs the "showy" style. Without breaking your neck (don't try it at home, kids!) but only with skinned knees, some fancy bruises and a bit of a shock.

Maybe I should get me another obsession. A really boring one would be nice for a change.
(But the Captain and Tintin being so perfect together makes it hard to resist. I even start lusting after some longish fan-fiction stories or a role-playing full of epic fails, crazy adventures and glorious misunderstandings. Once a junkie - always a junkie >3 any interested parties?)

Also, are there any Jeeves & Wooster crossover with Tintin's 'verse? There definitely should be - just think about how Bertie would have taught the Capitan to act like a proper squire (including playing golf without destroying the whole place, getting engaged a bit more often and bearing with less colorful ties).

I always crave for the wrong kind of crossover 
- try and find any Weiß Kreuz & Sherlock BBC crossfiction among all the single'verse stories! I ought to start writing again. Beware: According to my experimental reports I tent to amuse my supervisor a lot. Have some quotes:

[German. The next one will be in English due to the American Prof. teaching us. Since he won the Chemistry Humbold Prize he's the boss.]

"... der entscheidende Schritt ist dabei die Zufallsreaktion." [Sollte natürlich die Zerfallsreaktion heißen.] 
Und so eine Redewendung wie "... durch die gedankliche Extrapolation der Literaturwerte." ist anscheinend auch nicht Existenzberechtigt ._."

/back to learning. NOW.


PS. Yes, dreamwidth. Because I love to try new, shiny things out? And because of the tintin_kinkmeme. Obviously.
I'm still mostly on the LJ, though. Home, sweet home and all the amazing friends <3



lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Merry Christmas a là Sherlock, with a small touch of horror and black humor ;)

(Can't wait for the second season *_* Dominatrix Iren, creepy Moriarty behind bars, worried British Government and MI6, naked Sherlock in the slipping blanket of Doom, John punching his not-a-friend Sherlock in the face and much more to come!)


(c) twitter@mcguigan

Despite the morbid picture I'm in high spirits ever since last Thursday, for it was the last lab-day this year!

Sure, there is a lot of homework planed for the winter holidays: 4 experiment protocols, an overview of the current articles in all kind of scientific Journals for our assistance professor (concerning one special reaction type I've first heard a week ago) and a Power Point presentation for my speech in January
(if you have something to say about "through-space spin-spin coupling" you may rise and give me a helping hand), but still - I feel quite light headed and free.
(and it has nothing to do with the champagne bottle on the table: It's not even opened yet.)

Being lazy is fun :) spending the whole days relaxing in bed with Jeeves & Wooster >3 Well, figuratively. The two of them are just dead lovely (especially Jeeves *_*). Yes, I fancy the series with Stephen Fry & Hugh Laurie rather keenly, it's really a shame they don't act together anymore ._."
A fan-vid to cheer up a bit? Jeeves - Gentleman´s Personal Penguin
(Stephen Fry is not as good as Oscar Wilde - despite playing him marvelously in 1997 -  but I do enjoy his writings quite well. The protagonist in "The Liar" is such a naughty boy and only a tiny little bit pathetic.)

And now for the bad news: I'm afraid, my apartment house is now known pretty well within the Göttingen police department. Some month ago a student gone missing (my neighbour) and now there is a dead body on the six' floor. The police says, it was definitely a murder, which's quite an uncomfortable idea. welt.de News quote (German). And I've always thought Göttingen were such a quite, small student city, where nothing happens. Oh my...

Er... I don't want my Christmas Entry to end on such a remark ._."
Therefore, smile, my dears, carry on and take good care of yourselves ♥


Katzenjammer by (c) goro79@DevArt
lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)

Sorry for the long absence - The university is eating up all my free time and the constant fever about 37.6 °C (~ 99.7 F) keeps me away from the Internet at rare leisure times. (savouring audio books or sleeping seems more appealing at those evenings.)

My routine now consists of dealing with triphosgene (it's almost the same as phosgene, yeah, that one from WWI but solid at ambient temperature)  or benzene (causes cancer and a bunch of other similar pleasant diseases to almost any part of the body and mind) or chloroform (which not only makes you dizzy and tired but can also be metabolized to phosgene -you again!- or cause an cardiac arrest).

Did I already mentioned I hate lab-work?
(I know, I did. Sorry for the battology?)

the bad, the good and the Cabin Pressure :) )


"... Declaring itself the rabbit of negative euphoria."
"What?"
"Not a happy bunny..."

lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
I'm a bit exhausted. Liar.
To tell  the truth, I'm really dead tired. Maybe I have no stamina or it's too dark and misty outside or maybe I just hate organic synthesis and lab-practice.
Whatever.
The first master semester is the worst - it's getting better afterwards. And don't tell me otherwise, 'cause it's the only hope I have.

Shameless pimping from our university: chemistry promotion video (I personally know 90 % of those people and all of the apparatus, so for me it seems a bit awkward with that sterile, unpersonalized off-screen voice.)
It's not science, it's art (almost German, but hey, there are pretty pictures of colorful test tubes?..)

I do find it a bit unfair, all you get to see in the vid is about organic chemistry. Well, at least 95 % of the show are. The lasers and the secretary girls aren't. Does they only mentioned all the three departments (bio+organics & anorganics & physics chemistry) to better focus on one?
And why is physical chemistry so shy? Without theoretical & physical departments there won't be any test tubes experiments and nothing to show off. Sure, page-long formulas or shiny vacuum-instruments aren't so sparky as simple test tubes but... it's chemistry too. Lasers and bombs, biophysics and thermodynamics, nano-particles and tunnel-electrons, Schrödinger & Heisenberg, eigenfunctions and quantum chemistry.

Why don't we have as mighty lobby as the organics with their pharmacy industry?





P.S.: Don't get me wrong, I still like the vid and my faculty. Despite the nagging. It's just ... I wished for more physical chemistry stuff in it, because I'm starting to feel like I belong to a repressed minority group o.Ô"
It's honorable but hard.
lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)

My microwave exploded, I have a sore throat and some fever, and the first Master-of-Science semester is anything but structured.
My schedule is full but due to our new, extraordinarily confusing university catalog (Studienordnung) I can't shake the feeling, I'm still missing some important lectures. And I hate lab-work. I'm a theorist not a synthesis-genius like that shy Breaking Bad chemistry teacher. Unfortunately. Otherwise I'd be out there in a veld, cooking meth with a cute hip-hopper XD
By the way, are there any fans of that amazing, dark humored, depressing and simply gorgeous series in my f-list? (Except the one, who is to blame in the first place <3)

Also, after the research work during the Bachelor thesis, it feels a bit weird to play student again. Plus, there are profs from Swiss & Ukraine holding their lectures in German, which sounds a bit wearisome, and German profs lecturing in English - vice versa would be a bit simpler but our administration despises simple decisions.

At least, it's not dull.

Last Tuesday we had a lecture about spectroscopy, especially the Mößbauer-Effect. Let me quote the slides with the synopsis of its discovery:

before 1958:   it could have been discovered earlier. But it wasn't.
1958:               discovered. Nobody cares.
1958-59:          okay, someone cares.. but doesn't believe it.
1959:               fine, everyone believes it. Still doesn't care.
1959-60:          Oh...
1961:               Nobel Prize!

Another Prof, another lecture:

"Here you can see the structure of serotonin: one of the neurotransmitters, responsible for the musculature relaxing, a so called 'happiness hormone'. Interesting fact: When in love, the level of serotonin is quite low. Then again, a person in love is excited not relaxed. Or so I have read."

And he was bloody serious about it. Lately I tend to think I'm going to end like him. What molecule exactly am I missing?
Enough of university, I still have my 'reactiondynamic' homework to procrastinate.

Oh, and John Le Carré is amazing when he writes about Ost- & West-Germany and the Cold War. It's been a while since I enjoyed such a well-plotted old-school Spy Fiction. No unnecessary details, every word is in the right place. And he sure has great observation skills. When he starts to describe a person I almost see a breathing human being even if he missed to mention their hair or eye colour or did so only at the end of the page.

Last but not least, Berlin was amazing, thank you, my dear <3

about 20 Berlin photos )


...Yay. Reaction-dynamics time!


Done!

Aug. 24th, 2011 12:24 am
lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
I'm done with my Bachelor Thesis.

And the grade's better to be really good, for I had spent 4 month experimenting and writing and negating that overrated thing called private life. (... and almost 90€ (=130$) for printing and binding ò.ó" - 70 pages in color and the pretty darkblue cover XD)

The fact (that I'm done) haven't fully trickled into my head yet. That I'm free. That I don't have to get up at 8 a.m. and start writing, that the presentation was a success (I have forgotten almost the half of all the things I wanted to mention and was still speaking for good 40 minutes~) And that the summer is back, even if it's only for a few days...

But when I came home yesterday, all done and happy and adrenalin-crazy, I just fell asleep... Embarrassing, isn't it? At the age of 24 one should go party, not curling in their bed and just laying still, too tiered to even put another Inkheart CD into the player~ (Tintenherz: a young-adult novel <3)

Then again, a guy who started with his thesis at the same time as me and in the same research group was taken to psychiatry yesterday. He's now in therapy and will stay in hospital for at least 4 weeks. So, I guess, my panic attacks before the presentation were still normal. (And boys are not as stable as girls when it comes to stress.)

Also, I've learned a lot of important and less-important things. The less-important ones are going to stuck in my head forever... For example, while learning python (programming language) I got curious about why on or earth is it called python? (My family name goes back to one certain python species, so I'm a bit touchy-feely when it comes to snakes~) I've never heard of Monthy Python till I've started programming - The show is a bit lame but it sure has it moments. Especially the film "Life of Brain". This one episode is just epic.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LQqq3e03EBQ
"You are all individuals!"
Yes, we are all individuals..."
"You are all different!"
"Yes, we are all different..."
"I'm not..."


The joke is really old, I know. Still love it <3
lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Oh my, LJ is back?!
I've missed you, honey. Take your time to recover - I won't be around for a week or so and when I'm back I want to see you healthy and proud again <3

As for me... Working on a scientific thesis is a bit like writing a fiction story. First, you have to plot the story-line, do your research, create main characters and figure out the rules of you fiction-world, outline a schema, a plan, write some scenes down, stretch that particular scene, it's crap, you won't do this, you're too dumb, too lazy, too damn stupid for this,.. wait, there is an idea! a new one, it might work, and now another one, that's fine, that's great, I'm a fucking genius! but time, not enough time! don't panic, don't panic, don't... oh. it doesn't work with those rules, you settled first? that's a problem...

Is it just me or is it normal? XD
Well, so far I have worked on the theory-part, on intro and conclusions, and background infos about chemotaxis - the language also our braincells are whispering in while we are not listening~ When I'll start the analysis part, it'll be a lot less poetry in it. A. Lot. Less.

So, Monday next week is the deadline for the first proofreading by Prof. B., and I so far only have approximately the half of my thesis done and LaTeX is like a capricious lover - it likes to be begged. And I sometimes hate the subject, but then I love it again and, yeah, I'm a bit tired but somehow still quite enthusiastic <3 after the big depression last week.

Oh, and a day after my the deadline I have to make a presentation about my research. In English x__x"
Have I already mentioned I haven't even started yet?

Next week will be really... hm, fun?

Just smile, everyone <3





P.S.: But I somehow manged to go to sport once this week and have nearly crashed the mirror with my trainers. I have lost laces a long time ago and we had to practice some sort of Can-can...

Just wanted to warn you never to dance Can-can without shoelaces. It's dangerous.


lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Cut for fancy thesis work and my typical university-talk about research, Profs and magic spells <3



click )

Speaking about freaks.
Can't wait to see the next Sherlock BBC series!
It will be hard to take the both guys serious after they announced Sherlock as Smaug, the Dragon, and John as Hobbit.. but I'll try my best not to giggle out lout. After-all, it's a crime-scene<3



(Crime-scenes can be quite obscure in real life... Once in a few years we get those book-voucher for our university-stuff and it's never enough, the books are so bloody expensive I depend on our library for my survival.  But anyway - this year I got myself one great Physical Chemistry textbook (Atkins) and for a few coins change a forensic-investigations-history book as well ♥ So far, I'm quite happy with the decision!)  

To continue with crimes and bullets and so on - I absolutely love shooting <3 It's relaxing and helps to concentrate your mind and take control of the body. It also improves your ego each time you hit the target :D (and I'm pretty good at that) Don't worry I'm speaking of paper targets - my hobby stays clean. The only damage I'm doing is to myself: sore muscles from the heavy rifle.
(And last time there was this old woman (Miss Marple? o.O") with a fancy necklet and a bright summer-dress, all sweet and nice, smiling, telling us some funny stories from the time she was still working ... and then taking her gun out of the handbag and shooting the target down. That was really some creepy old Lady. Respect!)


Well, I guess, the break is over - back to work.

Wish me inspiration for the BA-thesis, dear world :3


lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Best compliment ever: "Would you like to do your master thesis in our research group as well?"

<3<3<3

But since it'll take me a few more years, in the meanwhile Prof B. offered me a job as his research assistant in the group! I'm not sure if I can manage both scientific research and studying in the next winter semester (lots of labs x_x"), but I'd love to return in the group for the next summer semester ^.^

(I can't tell you how happy I am right now - I feel honoured for my brains and and my ideas.. and nothing makes me so happy as appreciation, I'm a vain girl <3 Then again, this kind of satisfaction I also feel after writing a worthy story or making a perfect Birthday-present - it's this feeling of "I-have-created-something-new". It's an addiction, I'm afraid, like adrenalin or alcohol, when it's not there, the life seems to be all dull and boring... )

But, well, I shouldn't get too exited. First things first and I still have my bachelor thesis and a few more exams to worry about...
And, no, I won't tell you what grade I got for that damn oral examination. Was I really that bad?... Dear Me, you should really, like really start learning instead of fangirling your bachelor themes, drinking coffee with the doctorands and go shooting [but it's so relaxing!].
(I hope my Prof will never ever ask me for my official papers for I'd die of shame if he ever sees just how bad some of my grades are. Why the hell was I babbling that nonsense in the oral exam? Damn²)

As for the first attempts at image processing, I wrote a small algorithm for this transformation (not that much of a challenge and I'm still fighting against those holes in their scopes ò.ó" )
[click-able photos]

      

... and then composed  those pictures to a video, where you can only see the strokes of their outlines and how they scrabble about, merging, falling apart, pushing dead bodies around - it's kind of fascinating. The creepy kind *_*;

I'd love to show off a bit more, but I'm not sure which results I can already show in public ._." (maybe there'll be a paper afterwards ^^)
I'll talk more detailed, when I'm done? But you can read the basics about the Dicties here. And right now the experimental part is almost over (or so I hope) and I have started analysing the data. So from now on it's just maths. (for example - I never knew that a blur operation is just a matrix applied to a 2D pixel. o_o")

And something completely different before I'm falling asleep at the desk. A quote from a magazine my college lends me:
[sorry, it's German ^^"]

Titanik, S. 40

"Schule des Lebens

Gegen Ende jeder Beziehung werde ich vorwurfsvoll gefragt, warum mir denn verflixt noch mal das Zerstören so einen kindischen Spaß mache, warum sich alles immer bitteschön nur um mich zu drehen habe und warum ich so ein beschissener Egoist sei, dem die Gefühle anderer schnurzegal sind. Schließlich sei ich als Akademiker ja nicht gerade zu blöde, die Regeln des Zusammenlebens zu verstehen, und außerdem alt und erfahren genug, begangene Fehler nicht zwangshaft wiederholen zu müssen. Die Antwort lautetet: Ich trenne eben gerne Erlerntes von Privatem."
(c) Thomas Tonn

_______________________


No end to my uni babbling in sight. Sorry? (In August/September it'll be over~)

But someday I'd like to fan-girl about Firefly, does anyone from my f-list watched it? >D


(P.S.: And I need to write that Sherlock BBC / Weiß Kreuz Crossover to get it our of my system...
Time, please!)

_______________________

silly Personal massage to somewhere out there: "Whatever it was, that made your sad, my dear friend, don't you ever give up!"

(Arthur is not plugging drugs here. Or at least I hope, he's not... <3)
lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
"The thing Jayne loves about zombies is that they're easy [...]
Sure, it'd get boring if they hung around too long – the things are so slow they're like a target for bitty babies holding their very first guns – but sometimes, a man just likes kick back, relax, and shoot holes in a few heads.
"

Can you imagine a better working day then hearing this fabulous audio!fic about Firefly (space cowboys!) and Zombies and malicious politics ... and working on your bachelor thesis in an empty lab, feeling like a king of your own slightly insane empire?~
Half of my research group is on holiday, so the lab's mine to rule! *muhrhr*

If only the computer wasn't telling me in the middle of an experiment that he can't find the microscope anymore. My first thought was, that a cable was detached, so I went down on my knees searching the cable-salad for some loose connections. Half an hour and a shiny tidy floor later I was at the end of my nerves and just shut the whole damn thing down. And then... a miracle! All of sudden the program seems to recognize the microscope again... I hate that thing and it's lunatic sense of humour.
So, if only the whole adjustment wouldn't take so long - the last two weeks I was getting home about 8 p.m. and so damn hungry and tired as if I was pushing heavy rocks up some steeply mountain, the whole work could be quite ... relaxing >D
(Yeah, good bye Taekwondo! My teacher will kill me the next time he'll see me. If he ever see me again.. lucky me, the last weeks had quite a few public holidays in Germany and on those days I only stepped by in the labs for a few hours, curious about the results of the last night...)

But, well, instead of ranting, I'd rather show off a bit - I got an A+ (1,0) for my presentation! ^__^ (shiny!)

Well, I was good, I just never expected being that good. But if they insists, I sure won't complain. In fact, I was feeling rather disappointed after I finished, I had so much more to tell the auditorium, but the questions were all dull (why the hell they asked me about the construction of some boring neutron reactor if they could have seen the very long derivation of the Fourier transformation instead?)

And on Wednesday I had an oral examination in the subject I always hated the most, so I probably should have been learning the last weekend real hard.
Expect that I was visiting that Doctor!girl I met at the shooting club... It was a warm and pleasantly odd evening on her balcony with some strange medicine students [those people are really, really creepy, but funny to chat with >3) and a guy who danced tango like a professional seducer. Just perfect. Finally I found someone who's taller than me! I only hope the next time won't be in a dark hallway but on the dance floor.
(Also, he's an American, reminds me a bit of Crawford >3 are people from oversea really that tall or is it just it just me, who's so lucky?)

... and I still got over with that oral examination. I'm not sure, which grade I'll get, but I had definitely not failed - otherwise the Prof would have told me so; he's someone who really enjoys telling students they failed the topic and have to come in a few weeks to see him again.

Strangely, I don't fell overworked lately. Not too much at least.
Sure, I'm spending all my free time working on that programming stuff, or lingering in the lab, but it's still interesting and I'm feeling so alive.

Also, have found myself great colleagues. And some friends too. And that tall medicine student to dance with <3
(Damn, he was just gorgeous!)

Especially unusual is having people around, who share more than two interests of yours.
You know that one cute girl from the university I was talking about lately?
Not only I can invite her over in my office and we'll chat about Weiß Kreuz over coffee (we're both schwarz fans <3), and science, and Profs. And... the world domination? But we can also go hiking in a beautiful forest nearby or having our Sunday film-nights with lots of Sci-Fi & Sherlock and laughing, and... I never had a friend to share all the interests at once; always had to split them to three or four people to bear, so I'm a bit suspicious - the girl is way too matching me to be real. (Well, not too perfect after all - we have totally different eating habits. How on earth doesn't she like spinach and paprika and aubergine? o.o) But It's a great feeling finding a friend like this.
... Oh, and the guys at the labs are quite interesting as colleagues too - and yes, I do find that quite abnormal unusual.
(btw, except from one exchange-student from China - I'm the only girl there. Now, that's fine with me <3)

Back to my actual thesis (I know, my f-list is probably already sick and tired of hearing about amoebas and so... but I'm afraid it won't change till I'm done with this subject ^^" Can you bear with it till August?)

Wanna see some creepy, bacteria contaminated data? <3



And my cool microscope with it's golden electrode? ^.^
(the poor cam quality doesn't do him justice, I'm afraid)



a few more shiny close up's )

Just one more thing...
On Wednesday-evening I had a quite revealing conversation with some of the technical assistants from the labs. She asked me if could turned off one of the apparatus downstairs for it's her finishing time and she don't want to wait a few more hours for the machine to cool down.

me: Sure, no problem! I'll stay here till late anyway~ *sigh*
TA: As usual, um? You sure want to make the best of you. Me on the other hand... Well, I already have my house, kids and a dog, but when you want a career, you sure have to stay till late and work hard. I'd rather have my family.

Some of those old women who likes to patronized you. Fine and all. But I just can't agree with her.

Sure, I want success, and, yeah, I deserve acknowledgement (who don't?) and I sure as hell want to make a Doctor Degree afterwards, but someday I want my house as well. And a child and a partner whom I can trust (expert for the dog. I'm a cat type <3) and free time to travel around the world and going out with friends and ... is it the bitter really, that you can't have everything you want, or is it just her way to excuse herself?

Then on the other hand, I was sure willing to turn the apparatus off since I spend the last few weeks almost living there.
So may be she has a point after all.

But.
We have those two Profs in our working group. A. & B. (it's their real names shortcuts <3)
And did I ever mention how really handsome my Prof. A. is? And how absolutely sweet his wife is? She taught us Biomolecular Chemistry in the fifth semester...And how cute the two little boys of the Prof. B are?

So, yeah, they don't look like they are suffering from loneliness. I guess, I'll manage it too. Somehow.



And if not... well, my amobeas still love me <3
('cause I have the glucose which makes them happy and the caffeine which calm them down~ xD)

lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
stage fright
-> NOUN: Acute nervousness associated with performing or speaking before an audience.


Never thought it would affect me.
I mean, all I have to do is to stand up and explain (loud and clear) a highly complex theme in front of round hundred students and a dozen of  Professors...

And as if it's not enough, my own Prof asked me, if I can play the chairman for the first session. ("Vorsitzender" sounds even more ridiculous.)
What on earth made him think, I'm the right person for that job? Standing there, smiling, call the lecturer on the speakers desk and cut them off, when they talked over their limits. I'll need a megaphone to make myself noticeable. (can you just push somebody down if they talked too long? And how am I suppose to moderate an obligatory after-presentation discussion, if I hate public debates?)

Oh, yes, the reason why it have to be me, is that the only another person in the run had a broken nose and will be operated tomorrow noon.
(can somebody punch me please? I'll try not to fight back. Not too hard at least.)

Also, shall I wear a tie?
Or a suit?
Or just drink a big glass of valerian before it starts?

(whenever I'm nervous or dead-tiered or just feeling uncomfortable around a person - my accent gets really bad. Otherwise it's almost not present but in those cases it sounds just... gross. Strangely, it never happens when I'm drunk - I guess, it's just a cliché after all.)

Also, it's impossible to explain the basics of "X-Ray and Neutron Scattering Analysis Methods" in just a half of an hour. The theme is huge and amazing and combines quantum mechanics as well as theoretical physics - after being engaged in the theme for weeks, I can't help but love it. And now I'll have to simplify it all in some dumb overview presentation. Damn.
(It's just awesome!)

So, the week-end of doom starts tomorrow and will go till Monday, the 31th May.
My turn will be on Sunday, at 11:30 a.m.
Wish me luck <3

By the way, it also means, I have to spend the next weekend in the labs in order to catch up with my thesis plans.
It's not like I'm a workaholic or something but.
Research is not a standardized nine-to-five job: I can take myself a day free, if my amobeas suddenly die from... actually, I still don't know why it happened that day. But on the other hand... Well, for example, yesterday:

(In the following the pretty Chef-girl who was so kind to show around the lab denotes as E.)

E.: - You measurement's time starts about 6 p.m. today, okay? Now that you can work alone, the experiment should take you only a few hours.
Me: - Um, on Wednesdays I'm normally at Taekwando. .. but it's fine. Really! I can pass a training or two, bachelor thesis is sure more important than that ^_^
E:  - Oh no, dear! You shouldn't sacrifize your hobbies, those are very important for the right mental balance.
Me: *beams with joy*
E: - Now that you have a key of your own, you can open the labs anytime. So, why won't you just come back right after your training? At 8 p.m.? In fact, that would be even better, so I can try one more measurement myself, before you'll need the microscope. Deal?
Me.... yeah, right. Till 8 p.m. then.

Will it be that despicable to wish my amoebas a few more casual death', so that I can enjoy a bit of the spring?
Hm.

P.S.: to make this nervous entry looks a bit less nerdy - I've started watching Firefly and it's absolutely great. If you like SciFi or nor - just go and watch it. Now.
Reminds me strongly of Cowboy Bebob. Especially, because of their cool but somehow really creepy crew. Oh, and because of the sarcasm of the show >3

lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
I'm still alive. Kind of. Just a bit busy.

With stuff like:

Learning how to work in a sterilized lab. How to handle an atomic force microscopy without breaking this hideously expensive, bitching princess thing.
Not going mad at the amebae or at my stupid self for forgetting to put the lid over the gold electrode for the night. You see, the most of my measurements goes over night, so if the lid is not there, the solution, where my pets are swimming around peacefully, will vaporises after just a few hours and they will painfully suffocate... while - for the sake of the experiment (!) - they are supposed to starve to death. Um.

Learning python. One of the most simple programming language. Or so I was told. Um.
Then again, I can use the few techniques I've already learned for ImageProcessing to automatise trimming my holiday photos. If I ever have holidays again.
(by the way, in UNIX shell programming there some really elegant rules: for example, you start a command with an if and you have to end your order with an fi. Also, once a program cowardly refused to obey. And yes, I'm quoting it word-for-word. Linux is sure crazy. And fun <3)

Oh, and I've managed that double-kick from Taekwando <3 And had my first shooting without a supporting "pillar" under my gun. Never thought that rifle was so damn heavy... I mean, I really have some muscles, I've trained with shinai for some years, I've done exercises with free weights - not regularly but still... I just can't stay still enough to take accurate aim. That's annoying! Especially since with that pillar I'm really, really good. Bother!
Well, I'll have to improve then <3

Oh, and I have to find time to sleep as well.
But not before I'll take a final look at my presentation for the next weekend. My turn is next Sunday, at 11 a.m. Yes, we're are just that hardcore in Göttingen.

And that one dear fellow from my university will convince me into an audio!WK-fanfiction. Damn her and her great ideas.

As for the shadow sides.... I'm consistently tiered. Physical and somehow emotional too. And I have that troublesome feeling of achieving nothing at all. Just struggling. Struggling and getting even more exhausted. I'm quite a patient type, but this time I want to see some results. Like. NOW.
Um...

So, in order to manage that current crazy schedule a bit better, I guess, I'll have to make my internet presence even shorter ._."
Don't forget about me, dears. Because I sure won't!
I'll be back (c)
<3

______________________________

P.S. Greeting back for kuru :3

P².S: Oh, and to explain the title of the entry: whenever the things gets too stressed for me, I tend to miss the deadline for returning the books back to the city library. This time I own them exactly 13 € for being such an idiot. Come to think of it - not my worst score.


lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Contrary to my previous plans I had to spend the weekend at the university, looking after my experiment which wasn't going exactly how I've expected it to go... So much for enjoying the nice weather~

All things considered the days are so frenetic lately, I'm slightly afraid, I bite off a bit more than I can chew...
Bun then again, it's spring, I'm young and the whole world is at my feet, so why the hell not?

For example I have a weak spot for all kind of weapons, but after a year full of kendo, I wanted to try out something completely different... So, at Thursday I was at an air rifle shooting - the every first time I hold a gun in my hand, not a shotgun though.
And it was an amazing feeling, staying there, holding still, full concentration and for a few seconds the world stays still ... and then - a fast sound and a tiny hole in the target. After the first attempts I hit the bull's eye quite frequently <3



... Despite my poor eyesight.
But, well, you don't have to boast 0.0 dioptres to take an accurate aim. The decisive factor is the ability to stand still. (After the first 15 shoots I had to make a pause though - to focus on a mean small point in a 10 meters distance isn't that healthy for weak eyes either.)
I'll see if my enthusiasm will hold for a few more days and if I'm as capable with small calibre guns as I'm with rifles than maybe I'll join the shooting association~ (this one: Schützenverein)

Even though, the members are all looking quite cliché-like so far. You know, so .. typical old school German. Old geezers with beer bellies, doing nothing but talking about how much better it was in the past.....
The only other Newbie was a girl of my age <3 (the new generation comes!) She studies medicine and on Wednesdays, when I have my Taekwando lessons, she's doing Boxing! I've seen her trough the glass doors of the next room in our martial arts centre~  It was quite a remarkable coincidence, meeting her there. So, afterwards we had to clink our coffee glasses at the strange twist of fate. And, gosh, we have talked till the very late hour, which is absolutely unusual for me...  I'm still a bit suspicious of fate. A few years ago I had complained, all the awesome people I know are living awful far away from me and now - there are people here, at my place, just a stone's throw away, whom I can talk to. About each and every topic I want; from SciFi and chemistry and theatre and politics to Sherlock BBC or Weiß Kreuz, or yaoi & yuri and travelling plans and crazy novel plots.
Life is quite awesome right now.
(which doesn't mean, I don't miss my far-away friends as well ._." But I've already planed to visit my dearest ones this year! ò.ó. So, Prague & Berlin are definitely included. And we'll see, if I can afford a non-European journey someday <3)

And a small university related note as well:
The computer applications lectures by my prof (my because it's his study group where I'm working at my thesis) are a bit complicated for I'm not really a computer freak, but at least the prof seems to be quite a funny fellow. Lucky me, he only looks like Dr. House (without a crutch) but his character is much nicer (and a bit awkward. Tight black jeans presents just a perfect contrast for the nasty habit of wiping the chalk from his hands on his pants. It always looks like somebody had grabbed his ass....) But I've learned a lot about python, C++, Linux & Co., so if after this evening I suddenly disappear from the Internet, it means, the experiment of changing my Windows to Linux went wrong and I occidentally killed my notebook....

Oh, and a few more photos, since you had to listen to me talking for a while now.. just lay back and click on the cut to enjoy the non-verbal photo-communication about Science Slam and the current girlish spring fashion presented by the silly Me <3


(c) ThOP
Stage @ ThOP )

~

massive self-aggrandisement <3 )
Let me act childish, I'm already terrified of how difficult the next two month' will be - I'm excited and anxious at the same time. How am I suppose to learn properly when I'm so high?~

P.S.: I shall post a few Lisbon photos within the next weeks... because one good friend pointed out to me, that when it comes to the memories of good times, even bad photos are better then none <3

lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
This note will be quite short, a mere sign of life: The university had started and this weekend there also will be the first series of our performances (my turn to speak will be in the third lecture-weekend - it's in May - on the third day... is the universe trying to tell I'm special? XD)

Lisbon turned out to be an absolutely marvellous city ... left by their light-headed citizens to decay. Absolutely irresponsible but with no bad intentions behind it - just the native laziness. As always.
No wonder the most remarkable arts and paintings belongs to an Armenian billionaire's museum - Gulbenkian's collection. They had Renoir and Claude Monet, Old Egyptian sculptures and Evangeliaries from Constantinople, Qing vases and décolleté jewellery.

But even apart from the museums the whole city should be declared as an unbelievable but amazing piece of art ♥ (one just have to clean the place up first.)

Unfortunately, my camera died on the very the first day, so I had to put up with my mobile phone cam - you can image the lousy quality ._."
(Also, I didn't realize, I was photo-addicted until my dear cam left me ... it's bitter)
Obviously, I can't resist to post a few stupid views anyway. If I just reduce the size to small enough pictures, then may be the low quality won't be that apparent?
I mean.. they do have modern art over there too <3



A bigger report with pictures and impressions will follow later, right now I'm a bit too tired for any coherent thought that is longer than two sentences. 
(We had to change the flights on the Airport in Paris. And let me tell you, there is nothing more enervating than spending the whole night awake, while on your left there are a dozen of homeless persons - I'll never, never, never want to end like that - and on your right a few workers, boring and drilling and making impossible loud noises. The whole damn night long. Why on earth does everybody seems to work only at night? In Portugal it was just the same - are they afraid to bring shame on their families if someone catches them while OMG! working?)

Well, back in Göttingen I rushed to the Science Slam , it's some sort of a humorous competition between the various profs and some mere bachelors, everyone tries to earn the audience's sympathy to win the game >3  This time it was Jonas Rohde with his comparison of the classic and the popular music. He especially talked about the "future-oriented attention" ("zukunftsorientierte Aufmerksamkeit" ) and how our brains rewards us (= likes the tone) when we can foresee or "intuit" the further trend of the melody~

Also, today I sneaked into an "Applied Criminology" lecture ("Angewandte Kriminologie"). Just because I can.
There was one "While Collar" episode, when an archaeology student attend to a criminology course and... well, there were no Neal Caffrey for me, but it reminded me a lot of the politics lessons at school >3 Next week I'll see if  "Criminology in 19th century" will be more fun. Yes, now it's "Garrow's Law" to blame ^^"

Even if according to Sherlock, I'm doing it all wrong: covering my brains over with rubbish and useless data.. but I just have to distract myself from being too nervous from the upcoming bachelor thesis.
Also, when I'm in an auditorium - I can't eat and it's definitely a good thing for my figure (in Portugal they always gave me a double portion for looking so thin and cute. And I just can't say "no" to a tasty paella or some hot lasagne >3 ... and now I have to deal with the consequences x_x")

Speaking about food~ I've discovered my weak point for Häagen-Dazs. Especially for the mix of two portions: Coffee and Rum *_*;;  It tastes absolutely delicious together <3

P.S.: My Dad told me, there were major problems with LJ lately. Was it that bad? Also - was there something else I had missed? If so, I would appreciate if you point it out for me, for I surely can't catch up with everyone o.o"


P.P.S.: Obviously, one shouldn't be boasting about enjoying the life way too loud - the university is an envious bitch. I'll have to work the next week too =/ In-between the lectures, the week-end performances and the preparation for my thesis (did I mention I have to learn python coding? Seems that my prof simply forgot to mention it the last time. Well, now I'm really a bit frightened of the upcoming weeks x_x") 


"And if you cannot sleep, let us hope it's from anticipation and not fear." (c) Garrow's Law.

lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
[EDIT]

Finally, the exams are over and I can fully enjoy my holiday, if only for a little while - at least, we're going to Lisbon for 4 days, so the upcoming week can't be that bad :)
(The was some serious miscalculating though. I couldn't have imagined having that big trouble with the BAfÖG-department, which makes me reconsider all my future "spending money & savoring the pleasant moments" plans. Expect for Prague. If there is nothing in your way, dear? :3)

The last week brought me not only a lot of learning for the last exam but also a brief glimpse at my future bachelor thesis work place~ I've got a lot of papers to read and internalise: about the amoebae's growing and starvation, about the image analysis (on the example of cancer cells counting) about the resistance-time graphs and the recording gadget constructions... does it sound like chemistry to you? And that's why I love it - it unifies physics, chemistry and biology in a cheerful threesome <3 As a part from from my f-list already knows, I've started studying physics first and I still see him as my ex-boyfriend (looking something like Sherlock from that British mini-series click, the behavior is the same. And, unfortunately, I wasn't able to deal with that odd and unintended cruel bastard for too long. But I'm not over him, yet, my thesis consist up to 80 % of his area of competence. The rest is Biology, who by the way in my head!canon is a cute blond and a bit naive girl. But since I'm not into blonde's, I have an established relationship with Chemistry - an amusing, mysterious brunette. Sometimes she is a bitch though)

Sorry, I'm talking weird. Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation but when you get neither sleep nor coffee the symptoms are just horrifying >D

Oh, and a small cultural note till I'll rush away, packing and flying to a beautiful city (where by the way also was an earthquake of the scale 9. Back in 1755):
Gattaca -
the most realistic SciFi movie according to the NASA. (and apart from the strong message of the plot, the actors are absolutely convincing. It occurs to me that Judy Law will never personalize any other character that perfect as one certain spoiled brat - Bosie, but since Jerome is such a princess himself it's only appropriate~) thanks @Nyx for the great recommendation! (and I'm still waiting for that book you promised me >3)

More infos when I'm back in Göttingen (somewhere around the 11th of April)

Don't get bored and keep on dreaming: http://soytuaire.labuat.com/ (not only the song is beautiful, it's also a  very meditative occupational therapy~)

[EDIT]: There really are some grave reasons why I'm trying to avoid posting after midnight. The entry sounded perfectly fine in my head but when it comes to writing the thoughts down I stumble over phrases, different lines of thoughts and inappropriate images. And it makes it hard to concentrate on the most important issues.
Anyway, for now I'm just corrected my opinion on Gattaca a bit, but when I'm back, I'm gonna fangirl about Beljaew A LOT. Beware of some old SciFi novels upcoming! [heart]

<daydreaming> PS: When someday I'm rich, we'll travel around the world together. At least sometimes? And we'll drink coffee and watching beautiful sunset burning out above the sea~ </daydreaming>

lokuro: It's the solar system, by ? (Default)
Some people accuse me of being a very cold and an insensible person. That's not true! I can get quite emotional. For example - I'm thrilled by the Russell-Paradox >3

Russell starts his reasoning with teaspoons. The collection of teaspoons clearly doesn't include itself as an element (you have to be a teaspoon to belong to this highly specified set of elements) But what about the complementary collection with elements defined as "not a teaspoon"? Since the set of not-a-teaspoon items is not a teaspoon, this set does contain itself as it's member.

Now, the next step: Let' us create the set S of all the sets that are not members of themselves. Will it contain itself?
Obviously, it can't. It would be against the rules, the definition is not to be a member of the set.
But when it's not a member of the set, it falls in the category of sets that doesn't contain themselves as an element and therefore it is the member of the set S.
You see - whether it is a member or not, we can't avoid the contradiction. The paradox.

Love those things <3

But, well, to prevent further accusations, I should post something really romantic and sweet right now  :3 Just as the [P.S.] to my former sms:
here comes the sun~
(c)


[updates]

University: Just one exam left! The problem is: I have almost 2 weeks to prepare which means... sure as hell, I'll get distracted and fuck it up. Focus, my dear! Concentrate! 

Job: A few hours ago I signed my employment contract, I was talking about in the previous entries. Since it's only a part-time job, it's bringing me just ~125 €/month (=174 US$) but the paper work I had to fill today assumed I was signing for some secret government position o_O" article, paragraph, clause - the poor secretary had to read it out loud. So, now I've confirmed by the oath that I won't give away any state or private secrets. Now, I'm really curios what's coming up to me XD

Culture:  I spend the whole weekend at my parent's, so we finally visited Hameln! The town where the Pied Piper of Hamelin walked abroad >3 The puppet theatre show was pure magic, I truly regretted, I left my camera home =/

Cinema: "Unknown Identity" - I'm tempted to say, that the best thing was the company the locations where the picture was filmed - in Berlin ♥ But I have to admit, the true Identity of the protagonist was fun to discover >3 (scores: 8/10)

Books: I found an old SciFi-novel written by Belyayev! *_*;; Just as cool as Jules Verne's stories! As a child I was heavenly in love with his books - dreaming about travelling, discovering new islands and creatures, and experiencing all the cool adventures :3

Or, and, of cause the fandom-meme, sponsored by my dear f-list >3

fandom love-life XD )
__________


[@Japan. Not praying but thinking about, feeling with and hoping the best.]


PS.: I'm really quite sleepy right now, so I'll beta read this post tomorrow, not now @.@

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